“My Marriage Has Fallen Apart”
“He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.”
Terria writes:
On 4/26/2008 my husband of 9 years left me. In July of 2007 he left for 9 weeks. Saying he was confused and did not want to be married any more. He was in and out staying home some nights and leaving other nights. I was devastated. I moved in Aug 2007 from that house. The next day after I moved he came back home. He has left at least 4 times while in the new house; he finally left for good on April 26 this year. When he left last year I relapse on crack cocaine after being clean for 13 years. I would do ok some times and use other times this is what made him leave. He has never done drugs, smoked or drank and does not understand the disease of addiction. He accused me of cheating instead. He tried to make it work but I continued to sneak, lie in order to use. I am currently seeking help/therapy for cocaine and alcohol abuse and severe depression. I am also on med’s from my dr. for the depression. I want God to restore my marriage and deliver me from drugs. My husband presented me with divorce papers and told me he has found some one else and wants to move on and pursue the relationship. He has been seen twice in the last 4 weeks with a woman be my close relatives. He says he does not want to reconcile with me. We are a saved family who had a strong marriage and happy family. He doesn’t call or come see us. He pays half the rent. This last month he was late. For 7 of our 9 yr marriage I either worked part time or not at all. We have 4 children 1 girl (10 yr) still at home, 2 boys (18 yr) in college, 1 boy (27 yr) i don’t want my family to be fragmented and broken. I want us to be whole again and my marriage restored. I know God can do anything but fail and I am standing on that hope and our vows. Please pray for our healing, deliverance and restoration. I have tried every thing and nothing seems to work.
Please note that the views expressed in this story are not necessarily the views of the American Bible Society. Story posted on November 5th, 2008 and filed under Loneliness, Sadness, Your Stories, Divorce & Marital Conflict, Struggles, Prayer, Christian Families.
November 5th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
Dear Terria:
The least I can do is to pray for your “healing, deliverance and restoration,” of course.
However, while in your own mind you “have tried every thing and nothing seems to work,” I perceive, in reality, that you need also to resolve some conflicted personal issues and not expect God to do everything Himself.
I have to honestly tell you that perhaps taking the first steps of serious professional/pastoral counseling to understand your own psyche and marriage/family relationship may help find out the cause and effect of your problems.
Understandably, you are too distraught to be in a somber mental state that can make your marriage work at this time.
Nonetheless, Only the truth will set you free from your anguish and agony.
John 8:31-32: “Jesus was saying to those Jews who had believed Him, “If you continue in My word, then you are truly disciples of Mine; and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.”
But, until one accepts the truth, one continues enslaved to one’s problems.
Our All Understanding and Compassionate God the Father has guided you to this web site, which is a blessed start.
I have no doubt that the day will come when you will experience anew:
“The heart of her husband trusts in her, And he will have no lack of gain” (Proverb 31:11).
Please take good care.
May GOD ALL MIGHTY Bless you and your Precious Children and Family;
GODSPEED, always and forevermore!
Mary Sun.
March 21st, 2009 at 4:39 am
Terria - Lifting you and your family up to the Lord in prayer. I pray you take a strong stand on God’s word for your marriage and your family. I pray that you keep your body pure as it is a temple of the Lord. Start each day in God’s word as you pray for His will to be done in your life, family and marriage. Read daily devotions pertaining to taking a stand God’s way for marriage and the family. One excellent source of daily devotions for marriage is RejoiceMinistries.org
Blessings, Deborah
Romans 8:28
July 28th, 2009 at 11:26 am
Terria, I know it has been some time now since you originally posted here. As I read your story, I can understand your feelings and reactions, however from a mans perspective. I was once a slave to alcohol, drungs, sex, etc…you name it. But my largest idol was the lust of the opposite sex! I started to focus on the problems, which led to more problems (I.e. alcohol, drugs, etc.) When I finally realized that I did not have to be a slave to the addictions in my life, that I could become a New Creation (2 Corinthians 5:17) I honestly started to live for Him, Christ, and not me. He took my sins upon Himself when He was nailed to the cross. He offers us the opportunity of becoming a New Creation! Know that He loves you and wants a relationship with you. Saying that you have a “disease” of addiction is a worldly saying. The choice is yours whether or not you want to shed that burden or be a slave to it! God bless you!