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“I Was Depressed and Suicidal”
Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
Shay H. writes:
God loves me in spite of my shortcomings; only he is perfect. He has shown me my heart and informed me that there are many people in this world but his plan would not do without me. That’s how much you and I mean to him. God doesn’t make mistakes.
About three years ago, God brought me out of a backsliding situation. I was divorced, abused, addicted to prescription drugs, a heavy drinker, as well as an adulterous woman and suicidal. I lost everything; I was on a path of destruction.
I was so depressed I couldn’t even put my feet on the ground to get out of bed; my children were suffering because of my actions. I remember crying out to God, saying if you will just put my feet on the ground, I will follow you all the days of my life.
So, he did … and I have been following him ever since. I no longer do any of the former things I did, I am a new creation. I even quit smoking in January 2007, without one relapse. He was my strength and still is and always will be.
I re-married my husband within 90 days of that prayer, and I have been given back abundantly more than I ever lost. God has done miracle after miracle. There are so many to list. The greatest of all is that his presence saturates my life in all aspects.
I always wanted a father-daughter dance cause I never knew my earthly father. So I wrote this to God my father: “Dear Daddy, I gently take each step here on earth, to one day dance with you gracefully in heaven.”
I look forward to that day, and I have God to thank for it.
To you and yours, blessings of peace,
Shay H.
Please note that the views expressed in this story are not necessarily the views of the American Bible Society. Story posted on January 16th, 2008 and filed under Praise, Hope, Drugs & Alcohol, Your Stories, Divorce & Marital Conflict, Suicide, Struggles.
January 16th, 2008 at 11:36 am
Dear Shay H.
I sincerely hope that you will have the opportunities to appear on public media to share your ‘GOD is my redeemer’ victory over your humdrum past. It is truly a powerful story. You will inspire and help many in your audience as His messenger without question of a doubt.
“The greatest of all is that his presence saturates my life in all aspects.” I share in your beautiful sentiment.
I do feel even closer to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ now when I change the Lord’s Prayer “Our Father in heaven” to your “Dear Daddy in heaven.”
See, I am never too old to learn?
May GOD ALL MIGHTY Bless you and yours, always and forevermore,
Mary Sun.
January 16th, 2008 at 11:56 am
Shay, wow, your story is powerful and beautiful and inspiring. Thanks for sharing it!
And I love that passage (Isaiah 40:28-31); over the years I’ve spent a lot of time soaking in those words.
Blessings to you, Shay.